Monday Morning Cooler Talk (Quasi-sports Edition)

Zidane: "Say something le mothafucka!"

Despite the total lackage of major sports, this was a suprisingly busy weekend in what can be best categorized as almost-sports. From soccer to tennis to golf, here's what went down on those awesome days you didn't work.

• I decided to watch the first and last twenty minutes of the World Cup and in doing so, I managed to see every instance where the ball met the back of the net. I can’t really offer any insight to the game other than the fact that Italy won and Zinedine Zidane lost his damn mind for a second. Zidane had scored France’s only goal early in the match and thanks to his rejuvenated play, won the World Cup’s Golden Ball for best player. As with hockey, soccer has no problem giving the MVP to someone on the losing squad. Stupid. Here’s a simple one. For any sport that involves a goalie, the MVP should always be the goalie of the winning team. How does that not make sense?
• I have no numbers to back this up, but it seems evident that as the World Cup progresses, America becomes more and more interested in it. Apart from American success, the World Cup could surely gain the American audience if was held more frequently. The problem that seems to face the casual American fan is that the World Cup builds up hype and by the finale, everyone is intrigued. But for Americans, the sport then becomes dormant for four years, new players emerge, and we have to re-learn the sport again. If the Cup was held every two years, it’d still be just as relevant but Americans could remember and identify with the individual players easier. Of course, this is a very American look at the World Cup, as I’m sure the rest of the world doesn’t give a damn if we like the sport or not. But just a thought to ponder for those who care.
• After losing six straight matches to Rafael Nadal, Roger Federer finally defeated Nadal at the Wimbledon to collect a giant silver serving tray. I was going to rag on the lameness of the Wimbledon ‘trophy’, but come to think of it, it’s probably one of the more useful trophies out there. When compared to orb-centric trophies like the NBA and World Cup championship trophies, the platter has the redeeming quality in that it can be used for something other than a paperweight. Imagine eating a big juicy steak on your Wimbledon platter. Awesome? Very. Then wash down the steak down with a giant cup of wine in your Stanley Cup. They should actually serve a meal like that at ESPN Zone. That’d be cool.
• The LeBrons finally agreed to a contract extension, and luckily it was Business LeBron that brokered the extension. Rather than taking a five year, eighty million dollar deal, LeBron opted for a four year, sixty million dollar deal. In doing so, LeBron will be free to sign an extension once the collective bargaining agreement expires that could pay him nearly $160 million over six years. For those keeping score at home, that means for the next four years he makes $1 million less per year than had he signed a full extension, but makes nearly $11 million more in that fifth year if the CBA terms hold true, for a net gain of $7 million. Not a bad plan on LeBron’s part.
• Tiger Woods finished two back at the Western Open. No he didn't win, but it looks like he's slowly getting back to form after his father's death. I know I can't wait until he returns to his dominant form, but nobody's rushing him this year.

Get back to work now. Seriously. And keep it tuned to TripleOT. Or else I may punch you in the neck.

--CH